Nacho Army of Club Penguin

This freak is a complete joke around here so I’m not even going to waste anymore time on this post

-Mustapha10, Colonists (didn’t drop it) leader

Thanks, Mustapha. You’ve wrecked me so hard my rectum is seeping skewed Doritos. Any ways, your reply was about.. 2 weeks overdue? We all know that Mustapha is a worthless pile of cyber-shrapnel and I would be in no way displeased if he tumbled straight into a large volcano.

First of all, stop trying to sound like some 50 year old scientist – you’re giving google millions of views per second. Secondly, I am proud to say that I have made you butthurt to the maximum amount humanly possible. You claimed to have “doxed” me and you spend your days posting pictures (which aren’t even me but ok). You’re so butthurt, I’m the reason you get out of bed everyday.

Alright, so let’s get something straight. I don’t know how exactly you can sound like a 50-year-old scientist on the Internet.. At all. Is that supposed to be some sort of insult? Because if it is, then I’m sure you lack the actual competence to come up with something funny. I keep giving you millions of views per second? Man, you must really suck at science. Okay, let me get something else straight too. You claim that I am irrelevant, yet you take the time out of your day making a post directed at me? That’s pretty comical, Musta. You’re the reason I get out of bed every day? Do you know how gay that actually sounds? Like.. Come on.

I’m happy to be this dudes motivation, but I want to educate my apprentice. DCP never has, and never will be a colony of the Nachos. So in every post you make, you can put all imagination aside and drop the word “colonists”. This may be difficult for you to understand, but sometimes you just have to face reality.

How can I be a 50-year-old scientist, but at the same time be your apprentice? What sort of irrational nonsense is coming from that keyboard of yours, Mustapha? Ahhh, I’ve struck a nerve. You’re demanding that I stop using the term colonists–does this by any chance rustle your jimmies? Because the way you’re demanding I stop using it sure sounds like you’re growing ulcers on your rear end by from the amount of times I’ve used it. Oh, and nice job ripping off the “He’s not on the Internet” meme, considering I made one of you a few weeks back, you couldn’t even come back with a remotely funny photo which represents me.. So here, let me help you.

Taking it easy in destroying you? No thank you.

Now as expected, Laoise’s internet boyfriend will write some more incoherent essays in which he will call us a “Dorito-like army” and how his strength isn’t measured by his weight or something weird similar to that. Since he’s known for his excessive usage of the same insults, he might even say that “you can’t be in the 313, this is the internet”; Unfortunately he may not know that you can be in the 313 area and on the internet at the same time.

You expect it because you know you can’t prevent the bowling ball of justice striking you down. And what do you want me to call you? A sauce-like army? You’re Doritos, right? So it’s only right that EVERYONE, including me, calls you a Dorito-like army. Same insults?? I’ve noticed you’ve gone over the same insults you used during the UMA/DCP war. Nice job, Mustapha. And Detroit is pretty much run down, so I’m going to assume that people from Detroit that serve as a soldier in DCP are probably broke and live in a ghetto.

DCP’s way of sucking up to Musta

West, I believe the correct saying is “wrecked”, unless of course you’re from a poor, run down city that has minimal supplies to keep you up to scratch with modern day English. Oh, and Nick, I don’t know why you’re still around, and I honestly don’t want to know, but I just thought that you should know that confidence doesn’t exactly exist over the Internet (especially on an app based chat). I applaud your efforts though.

Anyway, good attempt at trying to be smart. Perhaps if you brushed up on your insults, word play, and rational picture, I’ll start to find you funny.

Thanks,

~ Daniel, aka 50-year-old scientist

Filed under: The Nacho Army |