Nacho Army of Club Penguin

Today while browsing CPAC, I noticed a report on our battle over Brumby with the ACP so I decided to click and read the post. It was a good post, it covered the battle and included both perspectives, however it did one little thing that made ACP just a wee-bit upset. It declared the Nachos as the winner.

Not surprised, I scrolled down to find numerous rage comments from ACP soldiers and retirees alike crying out ‘bias!’

Wait, what? People are accusing a reporter on CPAC to be implying partiality through his writing and influence? Wow, not like that trend has continued since 2009.

Let me clarify that this is not a ‘rage post.’ This is me merely trying to save what has the potential to be an enjoyable war from the likes of a certain leader too stubborn and arrogant to embrace the possibility of a gracious defeat at any costs.

Just about everyone [by everyone I mean the ACP soldiers] in the CPAC comments section is accusing Zing of expressing bias in his writing due to his past experience with the Nachos; an army he no longer cooperates or communicates with. The reality is, they are just mad that Zing is exposing their fear of battle. In other words, he is reporting their little games of hide and seek throughout the war for the rest of the community to see as well.

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Perhaps your real motive is that it is rather damaging to your former armies reputation.

Are you sure? I don’t think you actually read the post seeing as two vital members of the board read and approved his post, as well supporting our reasons for declaring victory against ACP. 

I’m not going to comment on ‘Lord’ West’s opening statements, but it is hard to force an army off the server when they sit in the smallest rooms on Club Penguin for 25 minutes of the battle. Sadly, we can’t manually force you to control your mouse and move around. 

Now, because the majority of the ACP who found this post so infuriating were too distracted by the post to actually read it or try and comprehend what Zing was explaining to them, I’m going to break it down for you.

As you can see from the Nacho post, they have declared victory due to ACP not following them like they were supposed to. With this, this battle became the first battle since the Server Draft to have two armies both claiming victory – a problem. Mach and Zak both decided that due to the “Defenders not following the Invaders” rule, CPAC will be recognizing this as a Nacho Victory on our War Invasion post and Server Page.

What does this block of text mean? Why are you showing us this you retched Nacho?! Let me make it even simpler for you guys:

Mach and Zak both decided that due to the “Defenders not following the Invaders” rule, CPAC will be recognising this as a Nacho Victory on our War Invasion post and Server Page.

Your rage at Zing is unjustified and misplaced. Zing did not solely declare the Nachos the winner, CPAWM, CPAC’s CEO’s, and army representatives, came to the conclusion that the Nachos won the battle for Brumby based on the accepted rule that the defending army follows the invading army. 

Oh no! What does this mean? It means that until you guys start actually committing to battle and war, you will never be recognized as the victors in any of these US battles by us, CPAC, or the majority of the community. Believe it or not, hide and seek doesn’t improve your 0-20 vote Bam.

I’m going to be blunt, our US force is stronger than ACP’s. We are out-sizing them in the majority of our battles even as they call on plenty of allied enforcement for their US battles. And their tactical strengths? I’d rather not even comment. They are only hiding from the Nachos because they fear they would be overpowered by us if they actually engage in battle so instead they will run away and try to make it look like the Nachos are the ones ‘retreating.’ Most people have a name for people who fight like this. Cowards. 

But what about the multiple Ausia invasions you are scheduling? Including 4 in a row in one day? Your Ausia division is stronger than ours for the moment, we recognize that, but we don’t try to forfeit the battles. Our division is still attending and battling our hardest, but recognizing when it has been defeated (something ACP doesn’t understand). The other key factor in these battles? Our defending army is following ACP throughout the whole battle, but then ACP has no issues with it. In fact, the Nacho Ausia division is still forced to attack ACP on its own accord despite the fact that they are the invading army.

So which is it ACP? When exactly are you supposed to follow us or engage in battle at all? Or is the battle determined by who held the better training session? I really am not sure… All I know is that the way you are fighting this war is quickly ruining it. You are too scared to fight us during the day so you’re relying on your Ausia division to try and pummel us while you play the ignorance is bliss card during the day. Two can play at that game, but we don’t want to play that game. We want a war, but if that is how you want to fight, then we will be forced to make sure that you guys don’t win this war so you don’t rise up and spread our cowardice ways.

Viva Los Nachos 

Filed under: The Nacho Army |