rpf parody post

HEY RPF, ITS YOUR GLORIOUS EXALTED GOD KING LORD PAIN/ELMIKEY/SHINY/CPWORLD/TOYSOLDIER/CHIP/INSERT OWNER HERE. AS YOU KNOW, WE ARE THE BEST ARMY IN ALL OF CLUB PENGUIN AND IT IS SIMPLY BECAUSE WE RECRUIT AND ARE BIGGER THAN EVERYONE ELSE. WE ARE THE BEST ARMY IN CLUB PENGUIN. WE ARE THE BEST. ALL OTHER ARMIES ARE INFERIOR TO RPF BECAUSE WE ARE THE BEST. KILL ALL NACHOS AND KILL ALL AR AND KILL ALL WV. WE ARE THE BEST. EVERY DAY I CHECK THE MIRROR AND SEE A GOD AMONG MEN STANDING BEFORE ME BECAUSE I LEAD THIS GREAT ARMY, THE BEST ARMY.

IN ORDER FOR EVERYONE TO KNOW HOW GREAT WE ARE, I AM REQUIRING EVERY OWNER TO MAKE AT LEAST 2 POSTS A DAY ABOUT HOW GREAT WE ARE. THERE IS NO REASON WHY WE SHOULDN’T BE MAXING ONE MILLION ON CLUB PENGUIN AT ANY GIVEN TIME. WE WIN EVERY FIGHT, EVEN THE ONES WE LOSE, BUT WE NEVER LOSE, BECAUSE WE ARE RPF. NACHOS ARE JEALOUS OF OUR HUGE SIZE EVEN THOUGH THEY HAVE BEATEN US IN PREVIOUS WARS BY THEMSELVES ON MULTIPLE OCCASIONS, BUT WE AREN’T GOING TO THINK ABOUT THOSE WARS BECAUSE THEY ARE CHEATING. YES, YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST. NACHOS CHEAT CONSTANTLY. TACO IS FOR CHEATING. ALLIES IS CHEATING. I HATE CHEATING BUT SPRITE IS INNOCENT CLEARLY.

NOW THAT I HAVE GOT YOUR ATTENTION, I WANT TO LET YOU ALL KNOW THAT WE ARE THE BEST ARMY IN CLUB PENGUIN. I WILL NOT REST UNTIL WE HAVE 20,000,000 VIEWS IN ONE DAY. THERE IS NO EXCUSE AS TO WHY YOU SHOULDN’T BE ON CLUB PENGUIN HYPING A BATTLE FOR 12 HOURS STRAIGHT. WE HAVE TO WIN. WE MUST WIN. WHAT WOULD RPF BE IF WE DIDN’T WIN? IT WOULD BE BAD, BUT AS I HAVE SAID PREVIOUSLY, WE ALWAYS WIN, AND HAVE NEVER LOST.

GOOD JOB TROOPS FOR MAXING 100,000+ THIS BATTLE, BUT YOU WILL BE FIRED IF YOU DON’T ATTEND THE NEXT BATTLE IN 20 MINUTES AND THE NEXT BATTLE AN HOUR LATER. FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT. FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT. FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT. FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT. RPF VICTORY. RPF VICTORY. EVERYONE IS JEALOUS OF US AND WE CAN DO NO WRONG. IF YOU’RE NOT CONVINCED, THERE WILL BE 20 MORE POSTS THIS WEEK SAYING THE SAME THING. COMMANDO WOULD BE PROUD OF US EVEN THOUGH HE ABANDONED US TO GO DO SOMETHING ELSE.

YOUR GLORIOUS, GODLY, INFALLIABLE, GREAT, EXALTED, LEGENDARY, CHAMPION,

LORD PAIN

8 Responses

  1. Quite accurate

  2. That’s a little harsh. Some people like me can’t come to battles for personal reasons. Dont fire people for missing just one battle. Fire people if they miss the whole war.

  3. Ok. Phew.

  4. u suck rpf…..

  5. Well they better regret what they said because nachos are coming to get em’!

  6. Reblogged this on Nacho Army of Club Penguin and commented:

    classic

  7. its sadly true

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